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Topic: Penultimate Ingalactic Superyak, a defense...< Next Oldest | Next Newest >
Capn Jimbo Offline
The Godfisher

Group: Super Administrators
Posts: 1712
Joined: Jan. 2004
Posted: Sep. 07 2006,09:31

Occasionally I post on other sites, particularly when I have an exclusive, see posts that are blatantly incorrect or misleading to newbies - or - to put blowhards in their place.  It's fun!

Recently I posted a pic of a new Aussie kayak that I felt belonged in my Superyak class (Link to Stealth from Australia).  Since this was an exclusive I naturally posted a mention and links to here.  Unfortunately at a site that we all know - and that has become largely dominated by a small group of dittoheads, my post was highjacked into some crude and disrespectful putdowns of my term "Superyak", calling it elitist, etc.  Really pretty funny.  Well, after the usual piling on of this crew, I hadda little time on my hands and posted this (what a hoot)....


Great effort, keep it up...

Ya know I've been following this thread intently - well, maybe not - but these gracious gentlemen have managed, in their own diplomatic and subtle ways, to bring me around to their way of thinking.  Maybe the idea of high performance bluewater fishin kayaks was a bit too, uh, exclusionary.  And perhaps I was a tad too hard on the wonderful American manufacturers and marketing departments who only have our best interests at heart.  

I sincerely apologize.  You guys are right.  After all who can argue with the notion that it's the fish you catch, not what you catch it from.  

My beloved grandpa always said to keep an open mind, learn from your betters - don't reject em, embrace em.  So it's time for a big group hug - at least figuratively.  I recant my evil ways and elitism, my smug condescension, my fawning love affair with South African design, my predilection for Guinness.  Well, hold on the Guinness for now.  But I've decided to be open, acceptant, understanding and inclusive.  Open my mind and doors to all of you fine and well meaning gentlemen whose only error  was to respectfully show me the error of my sadly misguided ways.

I've gotta pause here, makin amends is always hard...

Whew!  OK...

Accordingly I've decided to open up my Superyak category, make it more inclusive, more American.  Make it the Big Tent, eh?  You bet.  And I apologize profusely to all those I may have offended or misled.  Please forgive me.  And allow me to humbly submit the latest Superyak, perhaps the Penultimate Superyak, to a growing collection.  From now on all yaks, kayaks - heck - ALL floating devices! - will heretofrom be considered...

SUPERYAKS!!!  C'mon guys let's all get on the bandwagon!


Oops.  Wrong Pic.


The Penultimate Intergalactic Superyak (and you heard it here first).  A Superyak we can all identify with.  Even Iconn.  Now ya gotta admit - it's inclusive.  It's non-elitist, affordable, an everyday triumph - promotes our common humanity.  It's American (from Akron, Ohio yet)!  And you sure can catch fish from it - and plenty of em.  Gets into any mangrove tunnel, great for freshwater too.  Easy, easy quick repair for any handyman - or woman - or at the corner gas station.  And it's versatile.  Collapsible.  So, so easy to transport and roll to the launch. Light - why it's SuperLight (patent pending) - how does 10 pounds (or less!!) strike ya? Kevlar, schmevlar.  And tough - trouble just bounces off this SuperResiliant (ibid) craft.  No paddle required - all ya need is a pair of flippers made by US Diver, another AMERICAN company  (Mirage drive eat yer heart out) and a bike tube patch kit.  And when it finally wears out, you can easily recycle it, or cut it into handy strips useful for gaskets, tying down new plants, and fishing catapults for slinging ground bait right to the spot.  Try that with your ordinary yaks!

My first impressions:  The New Roundabout by Firestone is an amazing craft.  Yes, I know what you're saying, it's slow.  But let's not be elitist here, there's always tradeoffs in this wonderful sport of ours.  What you do get is amazing stealth, SuperLow (pp) profile and it turns like it's nobody's business.  And turns, and turns.  Oyster bar - just walk right across it. So much primary stability you'll never need any secondary. C'mon now, be open minded.  Sure you're gonna look like a complete a** when you're waddlin backwards toward the beach.  Sure those SuperFine (pp) bikini chicks are gonna snicker.  But you just wait until you get to those secret hotspots that are absolutely unreachable by any other means - just wait till you "flip" your way backwards toward that very same beach, and back your way up to the water's edge proudly lifting your netbag overflowing with a great catch.  And as you turn in triumph, yup...

Total silence.  

The entire beach will be silent in shock, awe and amazement. Yes - a Superhero!! (reproduced with permission of Marvel Characters, Inc. and DC Comics).  And last, but certainly not least - is it seaworthy?  Golly gee, is it ever!!  Ask Elian Gonzales... rock and roll, guyz!  And thanks for your SuperPort, I mean, support...

Oh - I'd be remiss if I didn't link ya to a great guide for usin your new Penultimate Intergalactic Superyak:

Link to Penultimate Superyakkin for the ordinary good old boy...



Edited by Capn Jimbo on Sep. 07 2006,09:32

Tight lines,
Capn Jimbo

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